Wednesday, April 19, 2006
Lost and Found

Maybe my luck is turning around. Yesterday on my way to school, I found a diamond ring. Now the ring isn't big. It is only a half a karat total weight and it is made of white gold. I took it to the first jewelry store I could find to get it appraised but the lady seemed more interested in trying to get me to buy matching earrings and necklace. But she did tell me that they were real diamonds. I still want to get it looked at.

Now I told *Beloved that I found the ring but before I could tell him what my intentions with it were he immediately said "Pawn it and give me half." Now I thought that this recommendation was totally not needed. First of all I like the ring and since I no longer have any jewelry because of various reasons, I want to keep it. Now it isn't like I saw the ring fall off of anyone's finger. In fact, I found it when I was the only one on the train.

His whole reason why I should give it up (and give him half???) is because it wasn't meant for me. Well damn it, I think it was. He says that it has no meaning for me, what does that mean? Not every piece of jewelry has to have a meaning. My earrings mean that I didn't want the holes in my ears to close. This ring will mean that my fingers were naked. Is that good enough?
posted by JamaicanQueen at 3:13 PM | Permalink | 5 comments
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
My weight...

I'm not a size 2. Hell I'm not even a "perfect 6". Who the fuck decided that a size six would be perfect? I am a very curvy size 10 and sometimes I'm a 12, depending on the cut of the clothes that I want to wear.

Lately, I have been getting comments on my weight from just about anyone who has an asshole. And quite frankly I am tired of it. Now with these comments, some have been positive but most negative. The positive ones (if they can be considered as such) being along the lines of "Damn baby, you are so thick you look good enough to eat." To the what I guess the person thought was cute, "Oh, I see you are getting a little chunky aren't you." To the down right nasty, "I would never want to weigh as much as you." For some reason people feel the need to comment about my weight as if I didn't know when I woke up this morning. A big ass and or tits does not make you morbidly obese.

When I hit puberty or should I say when it hit me, I developed hips so fast that it literally hurt. See some got the vertical growth spurt, I got a horizontal one. I had "breeding" hips since I was 9 and I never wore a training bra. I didn't need one. I went straight into a B cup. Now for some this isn't bad but I was 11. I swear it was as if I went to bed one night and I woke up with them. Now being that I was a tomboy and I filled out, I got the looks of she's a ho and all that. But I really wasn't, in fact the first boy who tried to kiss me (well technically he did, he had contact for a full two seconds) got a beat down of his life. I hit him with a desk. I got suspended for three days. That kicked off my beginning of fights with boys over my shape.

The breast and butt thing just got worse as I got older because they only got bigger. This now brought attention from grown men who just knew it was their goal in life to separate me from my virginity or whatever. That and people just knew I was having sex because supposedly you don't fill out like that unless you are having sex. Which brings more attention because now men think I'm easy and the boys wanted to test this out. This resulted in more fights, on my part and now my uncle who had to now defend me.

I guess as I have gotten older my curves are no longer as tight as they were when I was a child and now I am approaching that FAT LEVEL. Who sits down and decides that you are fat and you must be unhappy about it. I like being the size I am. I just don't like hearing others opinions on it. For some reason the media has pushed this un-natural prepubescent waif into our minds and making us think that all women have to look this way. Now I am not knocking the women who look like this naturally because I had a friend who was like this, she could eat lard and fatback 9 times a day and not gain any weight. While I would just watch her and gain. When do you become the size that people just say "DAMN"?

When GOD was a woman, a full figured woman was what woman wanted to be. The extra body fat ensured that she would survive lean times and he children would have enough to eat. I showed that her mate was a good provider. Now I guess in time of "excess" the stores of body fat are no longer looked at as needed. The extra body weight is seen as a disorder and scorned. Which to me is a shame. I think women in all our shapes, colors, and sizes should be adored for the wondrous miracles that we are.
posted by JamaicanQueen at 4:22 PM | Permalink | 4 comments
Sunday, April 09, 2006
It has been a funny few days...
Well let's get the good news out of the way. One of my links Michelle had her little boy on the fifth. And I am so happy for her and I hope that she and the new installment to her family are doing well.

But back the bull that is my life.

I spoke to my supervisor and I told him that *MC wants me to work for her and he said and I quote because it isn't long, "NO." All I could say is well then. So I told her that he said he really couldn't spare me and I don't think that she is used to hearing no and wanted his extension so she can talk to him. I hope the world doesn't fall down on my head after this.

Next...I come home on Thursday and my son's school sweater is cut up. So I ask him what has happened to his clothes and he tells me that an eighth grader has cut his clothes. Now he goes to a private school, so there aren't many kids in that school. I make the resolve that I will now have to make it to his school in the morning. I think to myself that it will only be for a minute and this way I can find out what the hell is up with his teacher because I write notes and the heifer-cow just ignores them. I get him to school and we find the kid who has cut up his sweater, his mother says she is not gonna pay for it, so I may have to take a day off next week to ensure that she pays for my child's clothing....

Now when I get to the school I have people running around acting like I am a celebrity or something. Folks just asking me, well who are you? So I tell them and they are in awe or something. It turns out that my son's father that "wonderful" man that he is, has told them that I am not really in the picture. That and he has not attended one P.T.A. meeting or picked up one report card in this year. Now *Prince gets out of school next month. What the hell? I swear if I ever wanted to beat his ass with a rusty lead pipe now is the damn time. Before, you say anything, he tells me that he has this under control, and I was figuring that since it won't be for long he should be able to handle one school year. Well it seems that he simply can not. I swear I learn more and more about that man every day. And to think I once considered having another child with this man...HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Now since I mentioned it, *Prince gets out of school next month on the sixteenth. And his cousin who usually watches him doesn't get out of school until the end of June. I would cry but I am too busy think how the hell I am to dig myself out of this whole mess. Speaking of mess, there seems to a problem with my second job, so I can't work there until they clear it up. It seem when they hired me I wasn't given all the paper work and some other mess. There is even talk of me having to pay back some of the money. I would continue but I have to get some work done. Gotta get ready for school tomorrow.
posted by JamaicanQueen at 5:08 PM | Permalink | 4 comments
Tuesday, April 04, 2006
Yeah I'm a thief...

I got this from Nikki.

1. How old were you the first time? I am gonna sound like such a rusty garden tool but I was 14.

2. Name of your first? Rodney..I look back and think I wasted good pussy juice on him.

3. Good or Bad? Well until you get someone to "really" open your eyes it is always good isn't it?

4. Name of the worst and why? The worst is a guy named Tyrone. He was 26 and he had a dick like a arm. It was beautiful to look at. I guess he felt that because he had a arm for a dick that it meant he never had to learn to use it. Such a waste...

5. Name of the best and why? Oh the best...That is easy. It would have to be a guy named Will. I swear he rode me for hours. He wouldn't go limp even after he came. The thing is he didn't tell me that and I see a hard dick as a challenge. He had to pour me into a cab after that and I couldn't sit straight for three days.

6. Weirdest place you ever had sex? I don't think I've had sex in any weird places. What would make it weird?

7. Favorite Position: Oh that would have to be doggy...There is something about a man slapping my ass and pulling my hair.

8. Ever fake an orgasm? Yeah..Once when I wanted this guy to get the hell off of me. I had to go home so I could get some sleep to go to work.

9. Would you admit it if the person asked? No because he is the type of guy who's whole world would be crushed if he thought he couldn't deliver. And he is such a sweetheart I couldn't do that to him.

10. Favorite time of day to have sex? Anytime his (*Beloved's) dick is hard. Well as long as it doesn't mess with me making money.

11 Most times you have had sex in one day? The most in one day would be 8. The days before I had a son. Ah...Memories.

12 Same person? No that would be with my son's father. When I used to like that man touching me. Now when he brushes up against me, I want to hit him with a baseball bat. But that is another story.

13. Ever fantasize about someone other than the one your with? No, if it is good then I can't think straight. If it isn't then I watch my nails grow. Or I used to now I would either get up or get on top to do it myself.

14. Restrictions during sex? No anal. One, because it looks like it hurts ( I have also been told that it does) and two, is well you gotta have something to give your husband, now don't cha? Oh and others are no animals or children. You must be over 18 to get on this ride.

15. Accessories? Yeah..gotta love them.

16. What? Honey (any one who says they want to lick this stuff off of your whole body has never done it), handcuffs (fuzzy and police issue..Don't ask), dildos, strap-ons, strawberry syrup (wink to *Beloved), vibrators the list can go on...

17 Done it in the rain? Yup, and I ruined a good weave when I did it.

18 Done it in a car? Yeah. I will always have a soft spot for Mustangs and Pickup Trucks.

19 Had a Threesome? Yes. But it depends on which kind you are talking about.

20 Want to have sex now? You damn right...Dick is a beautiful thing.
posted by JamaicanQueen at 8:11 PM | Permalink | 4 comments
Saturday, April 01, 2006
A new window...

A few weeks ago I had an interview for a promotion and I thought it went very well. The woman who interviewed me had a wonderful time with me and I with her. The interview lasted for about two and a half hours and who has an interview that lasts that long.

Well I sent my thank you letter after the interview and I waited. After two weeks I figured that the interview must not have gone as well as I thought. And I stopped looking for the phone call that would tell me I got it and started looking in the inter-office mail that would tell me I didn't. Well yesterday, *MC (the woman who interviewed me) came to the job to speak with me but I had got to work yet. She came to offer me another position with her. Now while it really wouldn't be a promotion, but I would be able to get more hours with her in her department.

At first I was more hurt that they gave the position to someone else after I tried so hard to get it but I am incredibly pleased that *MC herself came to offer me this alternative. She doesn't offer anyone anything, in fact there are people who are scared of her in my department and they don't have to work with her. They just remember her from when she was in our department, like eight years ago. I so want to work for someone who has that power. I think I am nearly drunk with the idea that she actually likes me that much to open that position for me. Not to mention if another position opens up, I'll most likely be available through her to obtain it.

Then the personal ideas of it are that, I would be closer to *Beloved at his job. And did I mention that I would be able to have more hours. I might have to think about it more, but I think I will take it. I just have to talk to my supervisor. She didn't tell him and I guess that just shows how high on the "food chain" she is. She doesn't have to tell him of her intentions.
posted by JamaicanQueen at 6:35 AM | Permalink | 5 comments